What Boredem Does to Ulquiorra Schiffer
by Aizen's Bitch Curl
Summary: Ulquiorra gets bored, and stuff happens. Lemon in 1 chapter! R&R For cuartasextalover. Implied Gin/Aizen Grimm/Ilforte and Ilforte/Szayel OOC!
1. Chapter 1

_Chapter 1: Gin's Trap_

Ulquiorra walked around aimlessly. Another meeting would not be called for another day or so. He was not in the mood to eat any souls, or even go back to his palace. He did not want listen to his two fracción talk about nothing. He hated small talk, whether it was or was not towards him. Menoly and Loly talked about…womanly things. Disgusting womanly things. As in sex, who is cute, pregnancy, and _periods_. He did not even know what the last two things he mentioned were, but according to the females, they caused women pain. Shit, he hated talking all together, save for Aizen-sama is talking. He talked about rather important things…like this…and that. He talked about some things that Ulquiorra probably forget after the meeting, and then remember at the next one, unless it was a command, and or assignment.

As Ulquiorra walked down the hallway thinking about random things in his afterlife (because he was dead, of course!), Gin peeked from his control room. He betted Ulquiorra was just as bored as he was. Who wouldn't be bored, staring at many screens at one time? "Konnichiwa, _Ulqui_-san." Ulquiorra stopped and stared at him. Who calls him that? Why was he calling him that? Was it some kind of remedy for Gin's boredom? If it was, it was irratating him. "Do not call me _that_." he said in that emotionless tone. Gin walked out. "Why?" He said, that horrid smile stretching pass it's normal extent. Even though Ulquiorra thought it was physically impossible for any being to do that, he knew that it meant trouble. The Cuarta Espada quickly turned around, hastily walking towards…wherever he came from. He _felt_ Gin's smile burn into the back of his head. "_What_?" he questioned, speeding up the velocity of his walking. "Where are you going?"

"Somewhere.""Where is 'Somewhere'?"

"I do not know."

"You don't know where you're going?"

Ulquiorra stopped, causing Gin to bump into him. "Do you have to walk so close to me?" Gin merely smiled at him…as he does everyone else. "Wanna go to the human world?" Ulquiorra looked at him as if he was stupid. "Did Aizen-sama give us orders to go?" Gin put his arm around Ulquiorra's shoulder. Ulquiorra kept his eyes glued to Gin's hand. Why was he touching him? In addition, why wasn't Ulquiorra doing anything about it? He mentally sneered. He _hated _boredom. It made him act differently. The silver-haired demon put his lips up the Arrancar's ear. "It'll be our little secret, okay? Besides, we're just people watching. You have nothing to do, I have nothing to do. Why go for it?" Gin had a point. A harmless activity it was. Aizen-sama couldn't punish the both of them for such an innocent doing. Could he? Ulquiorra didn't like the feeling of boredom at all.

"So, whataya say?" Ulquiorra closed his eyes and thought. "Yes." Gin chuckled. "Alright let's go!" Gin walked up the hall. _This probably most I've ever seen him talk. I've gotta tell Aizen! _Gin thought.

_**Five Minutes Later**_

Gin laughed crazily as he pointed to some red haired man. "Okay, okay, okay! That guy over there!" he said pointing to a blonde man. "He kind of looks like Kira!" Gin broke out in another fit of laughter. Ulquiorra merely just stood there, looking at the man. He had on a black cloak with red clouds on it. He had a bang covering his right eye, and ponytail placed a top his head. He was currently yelling at some man with an orange, lolly pop shaped masked who wore the same clothing. As far as the arrancar knew, he had no clue who Kira was. If he did know, "Kira" would probably be a homosexual. Ulquiorra sat on the nearest building, tired of floating hundreds of meters in the air. Gin floated beside Ulquiorra. "My apologies if I'm boring you." Ulquiorra sighed. "This is just not my day, Gin." Ulquiorra said. Gin frowned (to Ulquiorra's unseen surprise.). Ulquiorra looked sad. He actually _looked sad_, his melancholic expression adding even more to it.

Gin looked around, as if he was looking for something. He flew around the building constantly. Ulquiorra started to get irritated. "What are you searching for?" Gin felt his infamous smile creep back up on his face. "Oooh, nothing, Ulqui-san." Ulquiorra glared at him…well looked even creepier than he normally looked. Ulquiorra stood up fully, standing on ledge, looking as if he might fall, and or trying to commit suicide. "Hey Ulquiorra, get over here! This is 'ttention grabbin'!" Ulquiorra walked over to the other side of the building. What could be so attention grabbing? Ulquiorra froze. What he saw particularly "grabbed" his attention. _**The **_Sexta Espada sat on another building with one of his fracción, Ilforte Granz. They sat rather close, which bothered Ulquiorra somewhat. "Gin, why are you showing me such things?" He heard no response, which was weird…for Gin. "Gin?" he turned around to find no one. He cursed himself. _A SETUP! _He knew they were there. He knew Ulquiorra was bored. Gin had thought it out so damn good, and Ulquiorra's "boredom" had blinded him from the truth. Why didn't the Espada just walk away? _Because Gin would never leave you alone._ His conscious answered. Ulquiorra now had another feeling. _Curiosity_. The man flew down to the couple. He guessed they were caught up in the moment since they didn't notice the little riatsu he was giving off.

"What are you two doing?" he said, as Ilforte jumped about ten feet into the sky. "Ulquiorra?" Grimmjow said, not showing the least bit of surprise. "What the hell are you doing here?" he said, his showing little astonishment. He didn't even bother to turn around and look at him, which was somewhat disrespectful. He just looked at people and cars. "Hey, um, Ulquiorra? How long were you standing there?" Ulquiorra looked at Ilforte. Who was he to ask questions to someone who was higher of rank than him? "Long enough." he said. Grimmjow sighed. "I don't know what's wrong with Grimmjow-sama!" Ilforte whispered. "He's been like this since he woke up. I tried cheering him up, but after a while, he started to depress me." the man continued. "I can hear you, dumbass." Grimmjow said. Ilforte ignored him. "My Grimkitty doesn't want to play with me! He's not even trying to be dominant, bro!" Ulquiorra looked at Ilforte. "Domin…hn." he said understanding what he meant. "He's no fun, so I'm going to the next best thing! My Szayel-chan!" Ilforte opened up a Garganta and ran in. "See ya!" he said as the rift closed.

"What do you want Ulquiorra?" Ulquiorra stared menacingly at the back of Grimmjow's head. How dare he? "I want nothing." Ulquiorra walked away. "Then why are you here?" he asked. "That is none of your concern." The espada walked away, to another part of the city. He heard a blade sharpening. Ulquiorra turned around to see Grimmjow unsheathing his sword. "What are you doing, Grimmjow?" Grimmjow smirked. "Can't you see I'm bored as hell? I need something to do." Ulquiorra raised a brow. "So you're going to be foolish enough to try and challenge me." Ulquiorra wanted to fight, no _kill _him, but he didn't want to upset Aizen for making such a commotion. "Let's go to Hueco Mundo." Ulquiorra opened up a Garganta and walked in, Grimmjow high on his heels. Ulquiorra jumped a few feet, no doubt that bastard would try a surprise attack. They looked at each other menacingly. The moon burned into the sand giving it a blue tint.

_**Las Noches**_

Aizen looked at Kiara, the one of the two fracción of Coyote Starrk, as she stood on the tired man's shoulder, looking through a telescope. "They're just looking at each other. The _suspense_!" she said. "Dang it Starrk, stop movin'!" A stress mark appeared on the man's head. "Aizen do I really have to do this?" The Numero Espada complained. Aizen merely smiled, and rested his cheek on his hand. Kiara's lightly tanned cheeks blushed slightly. "OH! Oh! They started fighting! Ulquiorra just evading the attacks!" Gin sighed and rested his head on Aizen's shoulder. "Why aren't we watching this from Garganta Broadcast?" Aizen chuckled…slightly. "This is all for Kiara's reward, not for us." Aizen said. "AND IT'S AWESOME! OH AIZEN, YOU'RE THE BEST, EVIL GOD IN THE UNIVERSE!" Kiara screamed, causing Starrk to stumble, but not really lose his balance. Lilynette laughed insanely at two. "What a fan girl!" Kiara leaned in through the small garganta opened. "Just look at Grimmjow's face! He knows he wants Ulquiorra!"

_**Hueco Mundo**_

Ulquiorra escaped another attack. "Why are you just dodging! Fight me!" Grimmjow charged again, Ulquiorra preparing to evade it yet again. Grimmjow sonidoed above him, beginning to bring down his sword. Ulquiorra, _surprised_, quickly unsheathed his sword and blocked the attack. "Grimmjow, I'd forfeit the fight if I were you." Grimmjow narrowed his eyes. _Forfeit_! Grimmjow thought it was bad enough that the little pussy was dodging his attacks, but telling him to _forfeit_ the battle. Forfeit, or anything related to that disgusting word was not in Grimmjow's vocabulary. It did not exist. It should not exist. With a panther's roar, he crashed his sword against Ulquiorra's. Just who does he think he is! Grimmjow was inferior to _no one_! Aizen included. "You little bitch! How dare you tell _me_ to forfeit..just give up a battle, like a little wuss!" He pushed his sword harder against Ulquiorra's. "Who do you think you mistake me for! YOU!" Ulquiorra's eyes narrowed. "What did you just say?"

Grimmjow smirked. "_Bitch_, you heard me." Ulquiorra jerked his arm away, causing Grimmjow to fly into the air. He skidded to a stop. "Aww, did I hurt Urukiora's feelings?" Grimmjow started to fake cry. " I really didn't mean to! It's just a characteristic of mine!" he sniffed. "Unforgivable .." Ulquiorra mumbled. "Hey? Are you crying, because you gotta a lil' somethin' riiiight there?" Grimmjow said, pointing to the tear trails on Ulquiorra's face. Ulquiorra blasted at full speed towards the Sexta espada and swung his sword, towards Grimmjow, who stopped the attack with his sword. "You _will_ pay for that, Grimmjow Jeagerjaques, one way or _another_.." Ulquiorra charged again, jerking his sword forward with killing intent. Grimmjow had a hard time trying to keep up with his speed.

Ulquiorra again clashed swords with the man, each of them trying to push each other back. Ulquiorra held up a finger, charging his Cero. Grimmjow withdrew a few meters, doing the same. "Don't you get it?" Ulquiorra said. "You can't defeat me." Grimmjow yelled. "Don't YOU get it!" he snarled. "You kissed Aizen's ass just to get the rank you have now!" Ulquiorra raised a brow. "What?" Grimmjow frowned. "You know exactly 'what'! You've been fuckin' Aizen every since you've gotten here." Ulquiorra charged down his cero. So that was this was all about? Jealousy, much?

"Grimmjow, If I was having sexual relations with Aizen..why would you care?" Grimmjow looked down, charging down his cero as well. "Why would I care? Because it's not fair! You don't deserve to be Cuarto ..!" Ulquiorra stalked towards the taller man, sheathing his sword. He stuffed his hands in his pockets. "I think it's something else." Ulquiorra stared at him, only mere centimeters away. "What the hell do mean 'something else'?" he said, horribly imitating Ulquiorra's voice. Ulquiorra now had another feeling._ Arousal. _


	2. Chapter 2

_Chapter 2: Here Comes Lemon…or not._

Ulquiorra brushed his fingers lightly against Grimmjow's hollow mask. "I mean, isn't it obvious? You're not mad at the inferiority of your rank compared to mines. You think I'm having sex with Aizen-sama." He sighed. "You're jealous, aren't you." Grimmjow narrowed his eyes. "Jealous? Me? No way!" Grimmjow stepped back. "I could care less." Grimmjow turned around and walked away. Ulquiorra just looked at him. He just couldn't _walk_ away from Ulquiorra Schiffer. He _wouldn't walk _away from Ulquiorra Schiffer. Ulquiorra had think fast, before he was gone, and he'd never probably get this chance to be this close again. _Think! Think! Think!_ his conscious yelled. _Wait..THAT'S IT! _He mentally smirked to his self. "Aizen was my first, Grimmjow." As he predicted, Grimmjow stopped abruptly. "He...was your first?" Ulquiorra nodded, the lie venomously spilling from his lips. "He was my first..and only." Grimmjow walked quickly up him. "Liar!" he yelled. "I have no need to lie." Ulquiorra touched Grimmjow's mask again.

"I was considering you to be my first…but you hated me too much. Then Aizen came into the picture." He reached up and pecked him on cheek. "What a waste, you could have had me all to yourself, yet you refused." Grimmjow narrowed his eyes. "REFUSED! When did I reject you?" Ulquiorra never offered himself to Grimmjow..never? Memories flooded his mind.

_Grimmjow roared loudly, biting Ilforte's neck with his jagged teeth. He thrusted in and out of man's body. "Yes, Yes, Oh!" he moaned like a 10-ryõ slut. Ilforte had a whorish blush spread across his cheeks. "I'm gonna..come!"he screamed. Grimmjow's hips gyrated. His breathe became ragged. After a few more thrusts, he spilled his seed inside of his Fracción , falling to the side. Ilforte wiped up his own cum with his fingers, licking them. "That was nice, Grimmjow-sama." _

"_Get out.." he said. Ilforte chuckled as he put on his clothes. He walked out of the door to see Ulquiorra walking down his hallway. He silently passed him, BOTH of them glaring at each other. "Grimmjow.." he said at the door. Grimmjow shot up, his eyes on fire. "What the fuck are you doing here?" he shouted. "No need to yell." Ulquiorra came and sat on the edge of the bed. "Are you doing anything today?" Weird question. "Am I doing anything today?" he repeated. Grimmjow crossed his arms. "Why yes, yes I am." Ulquiorra sighed. "Fine." He got up and left. Grimmjow merely humped his shoulders and laid back down, thinking about the real reason Ulquiorra came here._

Grimmjow widened his eyes at the mistake he had made. "I-I-I…" he stuttered lost for words. _It's not fair! How the hell was I suppose to know he wanted…__**that**__! _he thought bitterly. "I?" Ulquiorra started him off, waiting for him to finish. "Shut up!" Grimmjow shouted. His cheeks turned scarlet. Ulquiorra took a step to the right, and started to walk. In one, sudden movement, Grimmjow stuck his arm out and pulled him close. "Such strength." Ulquiorra murmured. "Ulquiorra." The man looked up. Grimmjow looked somewhat depressed. "Hmm..yes?" "…Did you really sleep with Aizen?" Ulquiorra half-lidded his eyes and smirked(A LITTLE).

"No."

"So you're still a virgin?"

"Yes."

Grimmjow smiled. "Good, because I didn't wanna havta to go wild on anyone who took you first!" He leaned in. "That's_ my _priority." He kissed Ulquiorra gently, the next time roughly, the third time sloppily.

_**Las Noches**_

Kiara smiled widely as she watched a smaller version on the Garganta Broadcast. Gin was rubbing Starrk's neck. The man moaned loudly. "Y-Yeah! A little rougher Gin, get the base of my neck. Mmmmhmm!" Gin tried hard as he could to meet the demands of the Espada. He was too busy trying to look at the Broadcast. "They're _kissing_ each other, Aizen-sama!" Kiara squealed. Aizen was mentally surprised at the girl's rabid demeanor. She was usually quiet, skeptical, _rarely _impulsive, and observant. But now the girl could hardly stay in her seat at the sight of two men being together. _I know what I'm getting her for Christmas then._ he thought. Aizen snapped his head towards Gin. Who was watching the Broadcast behind Kiara's back. His smile wider than usual. "Gin, if I tell you one more time to not look…._I know something_."

Gin gave Aizen a small pout. "I got them together! Can't I at least watch it?" Aizen poured himself a cup of tea. "No." He took two sips before glaring a Gin, again. "Gin come over here so I can slap you." Gin sweat dropped. No fair!

_**Hueco Mundo**_

"Should we do this out here? It's so…_unsanitary_." Ulquiorra said. Grimmjow looked at him with annoyed eyes. "Do I look sanitary to you?" Ulquiorra looked to the side. "No.." That remark earned him a smirk. "Okay then." Ulquiorra didn't want to be humiliated in front of Aizen's entire Arrancar Army. He couldn't risk it. He wouldn't risk it. "No, not out here." Grimmjow groaned loudly. "Come on, Ulquiorra! Don't be a fuckin' buzz kill!" Ulquiorra took a step backward. Grimmjow took a step forward. One step back. One step forward. "If we don't fuck out here, then your first time will be very _painful_." Ulquiorra narrowed his eyes. "What?" Grimmjow growled. "You heard me! I'll unsheathe my sword, cut all your clothes off, then sheathe it, and _fuck _you with it." Ulquiorra nearly tripped. "Grimmjow…." For the first time, since he was human, he felt _fear_.

Grimmjow chuckled. "Just kidding…" Ulquiorra sighed relief. "Ha! You should have seen your face! That was **priceless**!" Ulquiorra swept the invisible dust off his suit. "Whatever…" he murmured. Grimmjow shot his face at Ulquiorra's, like a snake, earning a kiss. Ulquiorra, _surprised_, stumbled backward, falling. "_Some_one's light on their feet." Grimmjow got on his hands and feet, moving like a panther on the hunt. His shoulder blades moving slowly. "Ulquiorra?" "Hm?" "If you have no feelings…or emotions…then how were you made hollow?"

Ulquiorra glared at him. "I never said I've never had emotions. I said I don't have them, as of now." Grimmjow raised a brow. "Why?" Ulquiorra looked at him more intently. This side of Grimmjow had never been seen until now. Was he masking it all? Usually he had 'roid rage. Now, he looked understanding, and, ironically enough, like a curious cat. Grimmjow's head tilted to the side. "Well, when I was alive, I was a loner." Grimmjow smacked his lips. "Like _you _were popular with social life." he murmured. "I find it hard to believe that you had a better chance at life than I did." Grimmjow smirked. "Continue." "Yes, I was a loner. My parents got me a therapist, but it did little good. They said I was depressed. I thought otherwise. I wasn't depressed; I just wanted to be alone."

"Your aspect of death sounds like Starrk's. _Solitude_ was it?"

"No. They didn't get me. I listened to different music than they did. I was multi-genre, not listening to just one genre of music. I wrote a lot."

"You were a young writer…so you MUST'VE been emo."

"Shut up. Anyway, I dressed differently, I ate differently.

"How can you _eat_ differently?" Ulquiorra was getting fed up with the Sexta's constant questioning. "_**Curiosity killed the cat**_, Grimmjow." he said darkly. "Not this one." he laughed. "I ate food my parents didn't like. Like sweets. They preferred roman noodles; I said I'd go out and get Chinese." Grimmjow propped himself up on one hand. "I thought they were ashamed of me. I thought they saw me as a burden. So I just thought…that if I locked myself in a room, than I wouldn't be a bother." Grimmjow narrowed his eyes. _Lots of 'I thought's'._ He chose this time to interrupt again. "Why did you think they saw you this way?" Ulquiorra sneered lightly. He sounded like his therapist. Ulquiorra decided to go along with it. "That's what I thought. I was wrong. They came in my room one day and told me how they felt. I told them how I felt. Satisfied that they understood me, I started to go out more. One day, I visited our Sakura garden, out in the countryside of Osaka. I found some boy already there. I didn't get his real name, and just started randomly calling him Adonis. We just started to address each other by nicknames." Grimmjow raised a brow. Where had he heard that name before? "What was yours, and his?"

"His was 'Adonis', and mines was 'Hermit'. Hermit means to be a loner." Grimmjow lowered his eyelids in jealousy. "What did 'Adonis' mean?" Ulquiorra looked to the ground, twirling his fingers around each other nervously. "You'll get mad." He sounded like a child trying not to anger his mother. "I won't." Ulquiorra rolled his eyes. "Saying that you won't get mad is like saying a hollow won't eat a human." Grimmjow huffed. "Okay, fine. I'll get a little angry." Ulquiorra looked up at him. "He was strikingly handsome, Grimmjow. He looked even better than you. So I named him Adonis." Grimmjow dug his fingers into the sand. "I told you." "Continue." "We just started to spend a lot of time together. We read books, ate together, swam in the lake, and all those other human activities." Ulquiorra looked to the ground. "One day, me and him were walking, in the middle of the night. Some thugs ambushed us. They said they wanted our money, but we didn't have any. So they took me hostage, and said they'd kill me if Adonis didn't come with them, to compensate for not having any money."

Grimmjow chuckled. "Gay thugs." he scoffed. "Anyway, Adonis just looked at me. He beat up one of the thugs…..and ran. He ran away, leaving me alone, to get beaten to near death. Then I just laid in the hospital for weeks. When I got out, I returned to my old ways. However, I was stuck on Adonis. I loved him, and hated him, too. I was so hurt, and I couldn't take it anymore. Therefore, I took two whole bottles of aspirin, and three whole bottles of ibuprofen. Then, as I laid in my bed, dying, I thought about who I could trust, which was no one. I was alone, and will always be alone." Ulquiorra stopped. "So, that's how you got the tear trails?" Ulquiorra ignored the comment. "Adonis was at my funeral. He yelled at my corpse, screaming and crying about how stupid I was. I decided to stay with him, after a while…I became a hollow. I refuse to tell anymore of this tale." Grimmjow was digging his fingers deeply into the sand, and then retracting them. "I'm replacing him." Ulquiorra sighed. "No one can replace him. But you can help me forget about him." Grimmjow then dug his whole, entire hand into the sand, a sneer visible on his face. How was he suppose to help Ulquiorra forget about him? This Adonis was the reason of his death and his first love. No one forgets their first love. Ever.

"Hmm," Grimmjow sighed. "And when we're through, if we're ever through, which I highly doubt, you'll never forget me either." he said smugly. Grimmjow crawled over and planted a kiss on Ulquiorra cheek. "How 'bout we start the forgetting now?"


End file.
